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Writer's pictureKelli Bachara

Two People Who are Drowning Can’t Save Each Other.


None of us are perfect. Let’s just start with that.


We all bring our own baggage into a relationship.. it’s inevitable. Relationships are hard because no two people mesh perfectly.

But sometimes two people are in unhealthy places of life, and their relationship becomes more toxic than good.

Both of their brokenness is not only bringing them down, but it’s further bringing down the other person, too.


Addiction, selfishness, denial, pride, mental health issues, stress, trauma and other things can weigh them down so much that they feel like they are sinking.


It’s heartbreaking because they don’t want to sink, but they are.


So they grab ahold of whatever they can, and oftentimes that’s a person.


And if that person is also struggling, if they are also flailing around in the water, they both go under fast.


Really fast.


Because the truth is that two people who are drowning cannot save each other.

Two people who have weights tied to them will not be able to lift each other up and out.


I find that this is a huge problem in a lot of struggling relationships.


Maybe you find yourself in a similar situation.


...Where you feel like you’re in over your head in a relationship and the waters surface feels impossible to reach.


Remember that the person pulling you under can’t also be your life jacket. And you can’t be theirs.


You aren’t supposed to be each other’s life line, either.


He is.


He certainly doesn’t tell us to look to another human for saving, either.

Psalm 18:16 says, “He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters.


If you are drowning, stop trying to hang on to people and things that cannot save you.


They can’t. God can.


God does.


You‘ll both be better off if you let go of each other.


That might mean giving each other space and time to go to God and heal with Him. To let Him breathe new life into your tired lungs.


Sometimes it means that you aren’t what each other means.


Regardless, the first step is always letting God be the one who you cling to in the deep waters.

Let Him rescue you in a way they never could.

Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;

I will protect him, because he knows my name.

When he calls to me, I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.

Psalm 91:14-15

~Kelli Bachara, The Unraveling Podcast

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